Lose weight for free

What’s the secret to lose weight for free?  Is it a mystery beyond the pyramids, UFO’s, ghostly appearances, or the single sock?  When people look in the mirror at their fat self it may seem to be.  But it’s pretty simple.  Here are some ideas.

Catch a virus.  No really, get sick.  As long as you get better, serious illness is a great way to shed pounds.  People lose weight while in the hospital.  It sounds silly, and it is silly.  So forget it.

Calorie deprivation is a great way to lose weight.  That means consuming less calories than you burn.  Drink nothing but water to force your body to burn fat reserves.  If you have the constitution to keep this up for a whole year, you’re set.  All of that is a joke, except for the part about eating less than you burn.  It shouldn’t be as extreme as only water for meals, but drinking water instead of juices and soda would save the average person about 90,000 calories each year, that’s 25 pounds worth of calories.  So cut down on amounts of food and drink the water, not the koolaid.

Exercise every day until complete exhaustion.  Keep up activity for hours and hours a day, seven days a week.  Were any of the slaves who built pyramids in the Moses movies over weight?  We don’t build pyramids any more but we can work out, in moderation.  It doesn’t have to be hours and hours of torture every day, but 30 minutes of aerobic exercise seven days a week is terrific.  While seven days a week is best, if you can’t do it, go for six, or five, or even four.  Try for every day but if you miss a day here or there don’t panic.

Bodybuilders burn more calories just standing around.  So strap yourself to the car and pull it for 10 miles a day, uphill.  Become a hulk, a mass of muscles so large that you have to binge eat just to keep up with the wild metabolism.  |Of course, in the real world weight training doesn’t have to be to the level of a marine drill instructor|Ok, so really just weight train in moderation}.  Keep off the pounds with muscle training at least three days a week.  In the long run muscles burn more calories than fat, even without moving.

Insanity isn’t needed to shed pounds.  It doesn’t take a lot of cash, or any money.  Lose weight for free with diet and exercise.  Eat less than you burn.

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